I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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