Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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