We won't sleep together?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
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