these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
