okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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