Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
