I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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