so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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