$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I will pee on everything he values.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
