im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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