if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
