well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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