i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
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