ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
