I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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