Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
