She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
that's an acceptable place to lick
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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