Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize