You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize