Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
