He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Barsexuality is the new black.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
