I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
