I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
