you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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