let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
