isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
