Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
