I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
