remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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