You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
vagina is talking i cant
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
