Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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