It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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