I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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