5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
