I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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