he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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