Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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