Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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