I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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