..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
The best revenge is premature balding
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Randomize
