he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
