apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
