Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
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