Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
is wine microwaveable?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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