it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
