You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
