I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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