after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
