It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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