You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
